Monday, March 3, 2014
Guard Your Heart, Guard Your Mind, Guard Your Love #pullingbacktheshades
I first told you a little about Pulling Back the Shades here. I am so excited to tell you that the book has now launched! Woohoo! And I'm ready to give you my review of it. Before I delve in too deep let me give you this link where you can order the book for only $11(use the code 'FIFTY' for 50% off until March 31, 2014!!!) and you can read the first chapter: http://pure-freedom.myshopify.com/collections/new-stuff/products/pulling-back-the-shades-erotica-intimacy-and-the-longings-of-a-woman-s-heart.
I want to say first that Pulling Back the Shades by Dannah Gresh and Dr. Juli Slattery covered so much more than just the 50 Shades books. It addresses erotica (mommy porn), intimacy with your spouse, dealing with past indiscretions, longings of a woman's heart, and more. As I read I thought of so many different women and different reasons or parts of the book that would speak to them.
Let me tackle the first subject and really the main subject of the book: erotica. Gresh and Dr. Slattery do an amazing job of laying out all the reasons why this stuff is so bad for you. I haven't read the 50 Shades series, I didn't watch Magic Mike, but I certainly felt the temptation to. So many friends were reading and watching and I wanted to tell myself it was all harmless but really I know it isn't. Even Christian romances can begin to affect your thoughts, moods, and expectations. These books and movies are all fantasy. They just couldn't happen in real life and while you may go in to them knowing that before long you begin to wonder why isn't your sex life that exciting or why isn't your husband as romantic as the men in the books. Even why isn't my life so put together and perfect like all these characters. It is a dangerous path to tread for sure.
The ladies do an amazing job of bringing together the things that God created a woman's heart to desire. They point out that the erotica industry knows these things and make sure that books play to those deepest desires. I can't give you all the information here but be assured that 50 shades plays right into those longings of your heart. That's why so many women read them and kept reading them. You can see in PBTS some stories of women that have read stories like these and the issues they had afterwards.
All in all, this is an uncomfortable subject. The church has done a very poor job of addressing intimacy. The basic response from the church has been don't do it before marriage (without many reasons why) and don't talk about it after marriage. Obviously I am super uncomfortable talking about intimacy but I think it needs to be addressed. I think our young people deserve to know that indiscretions before marriage not only can lead to pregnancy or STDs but can leave you with a lifetime of issues. Pornography isn't harmless, it is harmful. It leads to unrealistic expectations. It can change your desires and like those indiscretions those memories are almost impossible to erase and will affect your intimacy with your spouse.
I encourage you to read this book. It is geared to females but men could learn a lot from it too. It isn't just for the married ladies either! Single ladies some of your desires and needs are addressed here. Is this book perfect? No. Does it point you to God's plan for intimacy in scripture? Yes. I think this book is opening a new chapter for Christians and I hope you'll read it.
I received a free copy of this book as a member of the launch team.