And all thy children shall be taught of the Lord; and great shall be the peace of thy children. Isaiah 54:13 KJV

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Noise With Dirt

Perhaps you've seen one of the super cute items on Pinterest that proclaims a boy is noise with dirt on it. I always giggle. Speedy is super clean (but generally sweaty) but the concept is true for him. He's a constant blur of motion generally accompanied by any number of sounds (swish, brrrrr, vroooom, ka-chow!). He is so opposite of Apple that I generally just marvel at them. He has recently found his niche in baseball and he loves it. I'm a football kind of girl myself but I'm adjusting my outlook from what I wanted for him to what he is best suited to do. {Not that sports are the be-all end-all of his future but a part of it ya know.}

So I've reviewed many books about parenting girls. Honestly Apple remains an ever changing mystery so I just keep reading. ;) I haven't read nearly as many parenting books on boys. Parenting Speedy is no less important so I was excited to receive Raising Boys by Design by Gregory L. Jantz, PhD and Michael Gurian with Ann McMurray. The tagline reads "What the Bible and brain science reveal about what your son needs to thrive." Awesome! I was surprised to find out one of the authors is Jewish but he focuses his information on "God-given design" and "nature-based theory." The book is split into 2 sections and 12 chapters. The first section explores the way boys are designed and the second section gives advice for putting that information into play as you parent your boy.

This book has already opened up some great conversation in my life. First I've been discussing the concepts and research with my husband. Beyond that I've had conversations with friends that are also parenting boys. I've been interested to hear their take on some of the information presented. So far we are all in agreement with the book! Boys need to move, boys tend to focus on one main item at a time (and not as much on the big picture or related things), and boys need to be nurtured differently than girls. Amen to all of that! I appreciate that the authors realize a typical classroom setting just isn't feasible for most boys. I started studying ADD and Ritalin while I was in college. I was shocked then to find how often it was overprescribed and that was 15 years ago! This is an epidemic in our country and a sad one. I want more parents to have more information before they agree to an ADHD diagonsis for their child. I want parents to research alternatives to medication. 

I love the tips in the book about getting a diagnosis for your child (for a brain disorder such as ADHD or ADD). There were two I found MOST important are the diagnosis should come from a SPECIALIST that does a neuropsych battery (tests that take HOURS not minutes). If you are talking about a braid disorder it should be a child psychiatrist or psychologist- not a school nurse, counselor, or even a pediatrician. The other is that except in EXTREME (read RARE) cases a child should not be diagnosed with a brain disorder BEFORE THE AGE OF 7. 7 years old. When my child was in pre-k in the local school system at least 3 children in her class were referred by the teacher and subsequently "diagnosed" as ADHD. These were 4 year olds. It is highly unlikely that they were properly diagnosed. My child was not one of them but had I not gotten her out of that class she very well may have been the 4th referral.

I wholeheartedly recommend this book. I think it's essential that we research as we parent. Our first source should always be the Bible and secondary research should be Biblical based books such as Raising Boys by Design. You can read Chapter 1 here. Available September 17, 2013.

I was provided a free copy of this book by Waterbrook Multnomah for the purpose of review. All opinions are my own. 

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